It has been two years, ten months, twenty days, nineteen hours, and fifteen seconds since I have been a widow. I wish everyday that I could go back in time to the happiest days of my life. The good things; Cooking, cleaning, washing cloths, watching you fold cloths while I watched Life Time, Fussing because you would walk pass the hamper and leave your cloths on the floor. You had just learned to put everything in its place. It seems as if the simplest things that we do not think much of change and means much more, when the Days of Our Lives Change. I miss seeing you folding clothes and watching football, I would call Publix and order your football favorites to makes sure it was fresh for the games. I made sure to paint your Florida Gator Man Cave so it was perfect for the Season.

Those Days of Our Lives was Simple, it was Easy, it was good. I was washing clothes the night you left me, the clothes stayed in the hamper because I refused to fold them!! I was angry!!Folding the clothes was your job!!Those clothes stayed in that hamper for an entire year untouched! Because the Days of My Life Changed.

Every time I make up the bed, I cry because we made up the bed together. Now I sleep on your side of the California King Bed. I continue to try and make it through the days of my life adjusting to a world of change, I even had to start cooking again, oh how I miss you popping popcorn fresh on the stove for me. I make it through each of these Days of my Life with a broken heart, but trying to live a life to make you proud.
I wish, I could go back to date nights when you would let me pick the movie, and you picked the restaurant. When we would leave church on Sundays after you preached; we would have dinner, turn the phones off, light candles, and spend quiet time with one another. When you would sit patiently when I tried on shoes, and dresses you would just smile and say, you limit is 2 dresses, and you do not need anymore shoes. I would even go back to the days, when we praying and looking at one another trying to figure how we was going to pay the mortgage, and the bills when I did not have a job. How we prayed together, and how you taught me then not to worry! You would always say, Baby Trust God, it is no need for us to stay up worrying ,because God does not sleep he will take care of it. I just want to go back to those Days of Our Lives were I can breath and not feel like I am drowning.

I wish, I could go back to the Days of Our Lives when we would hold hands, as you Blessed the food at the table. I remember the last meal you cooked for me; fried chicken, rice, corn, gravy, and biscuits. That table has not been used since you left and the grease pot has been thrown out because I no longer eat chicken. (Meat). The Days of Our Lives was different from the Soap Operas our Love did not change when The World Turned, We never became Restless with each other, we worked hard together to make the most out of our marriage because we knew we only had one life to live. Our Passion for each other stayed true to the day you took your last breath. I remember on November 28, 2015 when we exchanged our vows so Bold and Beautiful before God, I just knew we would grow old together. I am so Grateful that we spent each and every day expressing our love for each other so I can say, those Days of our Lives were spent without regrets!

We lived out all of our vows in just three short years. I would not change one day of it even the sickness, and poor, I would gladly smile and do it all over again to have you and those Days of Our Lives back, when I smiled! So I can exchange these tears for laughter, this heartache into bliss! This loneliness into joy! This pain into pleasure!

Being a Widow is not easy it is an adjustment each and every second of the day. I spend each day missing my husband, but also spending each day of my life walking on a path that I know my Kenneth would be proud of. I encourage everyone who reads this to embrace the new Days of your Lives by doing something your Husband’s would be proud of. By making the of each day because we truly know that life is too short to live with any regrets!

About 

Jamie Foster resides in Daphne, Alabama with her daughter and two grand puppies. On January 10, 2019 at 10:30 p.m. her life was shattered as the man that God kept for her suffered a heart attack in his sleep. A fairytale that began so beautifully just three years prior ended in tragedy. She made a statement two years before she started dating Rev. Kenneth Foster, as he preached a sermon at her church. She said to a friend, “I am going to marry Rev. Foster one day, and make him a very good wife”. Two years later, after about 4 dinner dates, Kenneth told her; that God showed him that she was his wife. They married a few months later on November 28, 2015. In three years, they lived out their wedding vows richer, poorer, sickness, health, and till death do us part.

She never imagined that she could feel so much pain in her entire body!! The love of her life the man she prayed for is now gone. She immediately began to question everything she knew, everything she believed in.

After Kenneth’s death, she had nothing else to hold on to but the Faith that they talked about, the Faith that he preached about. The road is a difficult one, but she pushes forward. On this journey, she has come in contact with women all over the world who share the same grief and the same pain that she does. She started to find comfort and joy in knowing that others understood her heartache and pain.

In 2021, she left her full-time job to focus on her Mental Health. She became the CEO of Foster & Foster H.R. Solutions, an Independent Insurance Agent, a blogger of Foundation of Truths, a Motivational Speaker, and she is penning the pages to a book that is long overdue.

Jamie always knew that her gift, was her powerful voice and she is walking in her purpose. It is to help encourage, motivate, inspire, and lift up all of her fellow sisters as we are all on this journey together. She lives each day no matter how hard, by the words of Jeremiah 29:11 “I know the plans he has for me”.