When my husband died, I had a teenage child at home. I set aside a huge part of my mental, physical and emotional energy to do my best as a single parent. This was new ground to me. I had no idea what I was doing. How do I balance my grief and healing and support her in her grief and healing? How much help is too much? What do I do? Ugh! I had one goal in mind: Support my kiddo so she became an authentic, strong, confident, healthy, spiritual adult who will be prepared to substantially contribute to the world.
My child has launched and my life’s chapter of raising her at home has come to an end. I get choked up thinking about that. I will miss her, even though she is only a few minutes away. You see, our best conversations were spontaneous and goofy. I will miss her group of funny, awesome friends (who are so loved) coming over and calling me “MAHM”. I will miss a voice bellowing out of her bedroom in the morning hours, “I am thinking about getting out of bed!” “I am still thinking about getting out of bed!” “I am almost out of bed!” Or hearing the word, “Oops” from the other room. Or having her tell me, “Mom, you’re not half bad!” I count my mission accomplished as I turn the page, ending that wonderful life’s chapter.
As I look at the fresh, blank page of my life’s next chapter, I wonder what will be written on these pages? My life’s path has gone in ways I never anticipated and do not expect that to change. I hold my pen preparing and waiting to record new adventures.
My husband died suddenly in April of 2008 from a brain aneurysm I am left alone to raise two sons. Sometimes I feel lost. But I am doing much better