Often, with loss, you misplace your ability to focus. There may be lots of articles, blogs and books out there that contain the answers to your questions, but, especially at the inception of your grief, it’s too hard to concentrate or wade through them.
Consequently, here are three bite-sized “food for thought” tips. And, I find that pictures always help!
The Joker, of Batman fame, said: “We stopped checking for monsters under our bed when we realized they were inside of us.”
Part of the grieving process is facing your demons that whisper falsehoods in your ear, such as the following:
- “You can’t do this.”
- “You’ll always be alone now.”
- “You’re weak.”
- “You’re not good/smart enough.”
Exorcise these “monsters” by facing all parts of yourself – the light and shadow sides – which are inside of us all. As you integrate your new thoughts and skills, you will be able to discover the “new you” who is emerging after loss.
Have you ever pondered the following thought by Harun Yahya? He wrote: “I always wonder why birds stay in the same place when they can fly anywhere on the earth. Then I ask myself the same question.”
No matter what circumstances in which you find yourself, it’s always within your power to change them by taking proactive movement towards a defined goal. Remember, “flying away” from something or someone won’t resolve your issues. You want to “fly to” a well thought out situation in which you can find the love, contentment and happiness you desire.
Children, who are free of guile, often call out those who are not truthful by singing out, “Liar, Liar – Pants on Fire!”
Hmmm … As you navigate this new and foreign world to you after your loss, wouldn’t it be much easier if you could differentiate the liars from the truth tellers by simply looking to see if their pants were on fire? Alas, this only happens in cartoons.
What you CAN rely on, though, is your intuition. It will never lie to you.
When evaluating another person or a statement for truthfulness – or to even make sure you’re being truthful with yourself – complete a check-in to see if your head, heart and gut are in alignment. If you feel peaceful (i.e. no nagging doubts, red flags waving in your face) then you’re probably good to go!
I invite you to join me on Pinterest for more of my bite-sized coping with grief tips and thoughts.
