For no particular reason, my husband Glenn and my father have been on my mind all day. Losing both of you in a matter of 18 months was beyond hard.
Today has been a bit rough. It’s been 40 months (1239 days!) since you left Glenn.
My Dad was a wonderful father figure to my children as their grandpa. He stepped in when no one else was there to lead them. Dad made sure things were right. Then you came along. He was so proud to call you not only his friend but his favorite and ONLY son in law he ever had.
When Glenn walked into my life it wasn’t easy however, he did become a role model to the kids. He was more than just a friend to them. He showed them how their mother was truly supposed to be treated. How she was to be respected and loved. I hope he knows how much he changed and influenced their lives. Glenn was the type of man my father was. Good. Hard working. Never met a stranger and willing to help no matter what. I only hope I can continue to live up to what both of them believe I am.
There is that saying that blood doesn’t always make a man a dad, being a dad comes from the heart. A man isn’t defined as the man that makes the child, but rather the man who extends his hands and time to help with the child’s raising and his heart to love the child through anything. With my husband our family found this.
It is not always the holidays, birthdays, or anniversaries, but all the normal days that can knock me on my bottom. You learn to prepare for those big memory days and make a plan to avoid the stress as much as possible. It is the Sunday afternoons, Tuesday mornings, the random song on the radio or the sound of the neighbors lawn mower that can send you over the edge.
Remember that there is a memory waiting to bust out at any given moment. Sometimes it is a small ripple, other times it can be a tsunami. One thing I can say for certain is that I continue moving forward and continue to strive to be the person each of them saw in me.
About Pam Williams
Pam was born and raised in Texas and is the oldest of her siblings. She has worked in education for over 15 years with the last two being a graphic design instructor.
In the spring of 2011, with both of them almost 41, lots of baggage between the two (which fondly became known as “the luggage”, Pam met her husband and soulmate Glenn and soon after they began to merge their families. The wonderful journey began but everyone always knew it had been destined.
Pam is a mom and bonus mom to five adult children (plus two wonderful son in laws), a grammy to five adventure seeking grands , and widow after Glenn passed away due to complications of a congenital heart condition on November 3, 2019.
Pam has often blogged, journaled, and spoke about all of the joys, ups and downs, and adventures of their life and has been encouraged by many to actually share with the world. She has begun a personal blog and soon will be publishing for all to enjoy.