The Things I Leave Untouched Since my husband died suddenly in August 2021, I've intentionally avoided many specific things—people, restaurants, songs, TV shows, entire neighborhoods, and even certain highways and streets. It feels as though all of those things died ...
A cute little coffee cafe opened in my neighborhood today. I love local coffee shops. I enjoy seeing the unique personalities the owner brings to each through the décor, the homemade or locally made pastries, and of course the coffee. ...
Not all that long ago, I was told by a co-worker, in so many words, that my positivity is "too much" for him. "I don't need you to be so positive around me," he said. I was almost speechless for ...
A few days ago, an acquaintance at church made small talk with me: “How’s life?” And I expected to feel all the normal rage that question elicits for us grievers. You know what I mean. We are the humans donning ...
The ache of compounded grief in widowhood is a particular kind of brutal. You thought you already did the hardest part. The early days—the raw, suffocating shock, the nights where breathing itself felt like betrayal, the way the world kept ...
June 8 would have been 13 years of marriage. It is the 5th anniversary without my husband. Odd how the experience of that date changes. The first year.... I remember the agony of anticipating experiencing our youngest son's 2nd birthday,Father's ...
Have you ever struggled to want to speak God’s truth with faith when the weight of your feelings from a situation you find yourself in scream to cry out in despair? Even strong believers and tested warriors can find themselves ...
Browsing one of my online support groups the other day, I saw the post. The one the new widow makes, where everything is fresh and brand new. We are able to articulate and write things out (I don't know how), ...
I'm still a widow and will always be one. Even if I remarry, it will not erase the fact that I had once been widowed. It's been so long now, though, that I don't even "feel" like a widow anymore ...
People still get taken aback when I tell them that my husband took his own life. I work in the hospitality industry, and people like to talk. They like to chit-chat and ask questions. When they get to the part ...