Well. That clearly wasn’t him, now was it?
He’s the one who reminds me day in, day out of said broken heart. At least on days when I think too hard about everything that happened. This time of year, I do exactly that.
Not only does my Seasonal Affective Disorder come and slap me upside the head right around the first of September, these months are heavy with “Bret Memories.”
October 17 is our wedding anniversary. We would be celebrating 19 years if he hadn’t chosen to leave. 😳
His birthday is November 10. He would have been 55.
Then my birthday is in January (I’ll spare the age part), then his death-a-versary is February 11.
When I think about all of these things and the fact that he still decided to exit, it’s hard to believe he meant those sweet words.
I think, though, on that day, at that time, he meant it.
I feel like there were plenty of other days when he didn’t mean it, but on that particular date in time, some 14 years back, I think that he did.
It’s just hard to see the bright, shining spots when I feel like my world is going dark for the next six months.
That’s why it’s extra important that I hold on to them with all my might when I see them.
They help light my way until the sun shines once more.
About Layla Beth Munk
Layla Beth Munk is a blogger & author who was thrust into this widowhood journey abruptly and tragically on February 11, 2018. Her husband of 12 years had ended his pain once and for all. She soon made the decision that she would not let his final decision define the rest of her life or their daughter’s life, so with her sense of humor at the helm, she started writing about her newfound station in life. Grief waves still get to her, and probably always will, but with the help of her fellow widows as well as friends and family, she has been able to realize her dream of becoming a published author! Layla is so grateful to Hope For Widows Foundation for providing this level of support to her, and so many others! Layla has two amazing children, one who is grown and one who is almost grown. She lives in eastern Oregon and has a wellness & beauty background. Layla enjoys writing poetry, watching anime, and homeschooling her daughter.
Her blog can be found at laylabethmunk.medium.com and her debut novella, 24 Hours in Vegas, is available on Amazon.