When God created the heavens and the earth, He imagined a world where He would create human beings in His image to be His family. Possibly the dearest fingerprint of God in us is our ability to imagine. God’s gift of imagination is one of our greatest treasures. Our ability to imagine allows us to be creative and envision new possibilities. This can be a really important tool for widows seeking healing as we navigate the road through grief.
Do you remember imagining animals, flowers, and fantasy creatures as you gazed at the cloud formations as a child? Did you have an imaginary friend or a favorite stuffed animal you told all your secret thoughts to? When we invite a sense of wonder in our life, we harness a powerful learning tool to fuel creativity and innovation. Wonder invites questions and stirs curiosity. Our head and heart connect by tying knowledge with emotions.
God recently reminded me how He encouraged my imagination many years ago. My husband and I wanted a family very much. We struggled with infertility for thirteen years. We tried everything the books and doctors told us to no avail. I was in my last attempt with invitro fertilization. The roller coaster of emotions month after month was exhausting. The previous month almost worked, and hope was at an all-time high. I went to the doctor to get checked and she told me there was a problem and I needed immediate surgery, and this cycle would be stopped. She added it was not very likely I could try invitro again.
I went home devastated. I was at the end of my rope with all I had been through. I remember going home and falling on my bed crying my heart out to God. The tears came in a torrent. It was like the floodgates broke as all the pain, fears, lost chances, and frustration hit a crescendo. When I was done, I remember telling God I just give all this to You and surrender. I told Him there was nothing more I could do.
I remember being wrapped in a supernatural peace I needed so bad. Then I heard God whisper in my heart to imagine myself holding my baby. I thought that was a crazy thought. I thought I needed to give up my dream. I heard God tell me again to imagine myself holding my baby. It took me a while. Finally, I dared to imagine myself holding a baby.
It was that very night when I went to work God started our miracle. I was on my break when a friend asked me if I was still interested in adopting a child. (A couple years earlier my husband and I began the long process of becoming qualified to adopt a baby. After spending lots of time and money and getting close to being able to make a commitment to an agency, my job was impacted by a merger and the only way I was going to be able to keep my job was to move from Virginia to Florida. We were forced to abandon all the work we did with the adoption process.)
I told my friend I was, but we did not pursue qualifying since we moved. She told me her daughter just had a baby and wanted to give her up for adoption. She asked me if we would consider taking this child. I told her I needed to talk it over with my husband and I would let her know. Long story short, my husband said absolutely. Four days later I held my baby in my arms for the first time. God miraculously provided a lawyer, funds, references, and everything else we needed to adopt our daughter. We went to the lawyer’s office about ten days after I obeyed God’s voice asking me to imagine myself holding my baby. It was on our thirteenth wedding anniversary. Our daughter was placed in our arms to take home. God took it from there and made a way where in the natural it all looked completely impossible. My daughter is now 29 years old.
When we combine the power of using our imagination and excitement to diminish the influence of obstacles and motivate our courage, we can enhance the pursuit of our God-given purpose. God’s Word is filled with encouraging stories, testimonies, and declarations we can grab ahold of and embrace to lift us out of discouragement and despair. Our change in attitude can lift us to an altitude of overcoming distressing circumstances. We can cuddle in God’s goodness and thrive as we trust in His love and believe He is absolutely good.
Here’s what YAHWEH says to you: “I know all about the marvelous destiny I have in store for you, a future planned out in detail. My intention is not to harm you but to surround you with peace and prosperity and to give you a beautiful future, glistening with hope. When you call on Me and come to Me in prayer, I will listen to your every word. If you reach out to Me, you will find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. Jeremiah 29: 11-13 TPT
God loves and understands a grieving widow. He doesn’t despise her tears. Neither does He shudder when she doubts her faith in the darkness. Life becomes so different and challenging for so many widows. A lot of the time we don’t know what to do or what we even want any more. God understands. We are wrestling for our survival.
When God recently reminded me about the power of imagination, I began to ponder how it might be used in my journey through widowhood. Our imagination from God allows us to create, envision new possibilities, and see beyond the present moment. Using your imagination is a way to put your faith in action. Faith takes believing things you can’t see yet.
Now faith brings our hopes into reality and becomes the foundation needed to acquire the things we long for. It is all the evidence required to prove what is still unseen.
Hebrews 11: 1 TPT
If we can imagine something we want, we can see it in our mind. It’s a way to bring that faith to a form of life. It fuels our hope. Athletes are encouraged to imagine themselves getting the goal, winning the race, scoring the touchdown, and earning that gold medal. We can train our mind to see the end result we hope to achieve. That is how faith works. We decide about something we want and then imagine getting whatever that is. It is focusing on a positive outcome.
Imagination is expressed in many forms of creativity. The results are found in art, music, writing, buildings, and innovations we benefit from. Our imagination can help us envision a better future, develop unique solutions to the problems we face, and help us find new ways to glorify God.
The Bible has many examples of people who used their imagination to fulfill God’s purpose for their life. Noah envisioned and built an ark. Moses designed the first tabernacle of God and used skilled craftsmen to design the sacred robes and holy vessels needed to offer sacrifices to God. Moses also imagined with God’s leading how to create a system of government over the vast numbers of people who only knew slavery to set up leaders, judges, and laws that would give God’s people boundaries and rules to live in peace and prosperity. King David imagined and created musical instruments, music, and poetry to glorify his holy God. He lived fearlessly and conquered the lion, bear, and even the giant Goliath when he was just a teenager. He created strong armies from rough and undisciplined men who became great heroes for God and Israel. David imagined a future temple to serve God, and his son Solomon carried the vision to fruition. Years later Nehemiah envisioned how to rebuild the walls of Jerusalem and bring the Israelites home. Many more examples can be found.
It can be tempting and easy for widows to get caught in negative and worldly thinking. If we allow ourselves to focus only on our loss and the many discouraging challenges we must now deal with, we can fall into despair. God gives us the ability to look past the circumstances and choose to fix our eyes on Him. The Holy Spirit helps us transform our thinking to align with God’s will. God wants us to prosper and be whole. He challenges us to use our imagination and faith to break free from worldly patterns and instead seek God’s perfect and pleasing plan for our lives.
Stop imitating the ideals and opinions of the culture around you, but be inwardly transformed by the Holy Spirit through a total reformation of how you think. This will empower you to discern God’s will as you live a beautiful life, satisfying and perfect in his eyes.
Romans 12: 2 TPT
Hope is a result of the part of you that imagines. Imagination is a personal healing strategy. You control the direction you want when you go into detail. Picture yourself moving in a specific way, saying a particular thing, and going through a behavior to help you deal with unwanted grief thoughts. Pay attention to the thoughts from your unconscious mind. Ignore and redirect the negative ones. When your unconscious gives you creative ideas to reach your goal, write them down and give it a try. Listen carefully to your inner voice when God is leading you to solutions He knows are best for you.
So, for me, envisioning who I want to be now and what I want to do with my life hasn’t been very easy. Here I am approaching five years since my husband moved to Heaven. I’ve tried several things. Some were good and some were terrible. Through all of it I’ve been seeking God to help me. Unquestionably He has been ever faithful.
As I studied a little more on this I learned sometimes when people experience a painful traumatic event it can be challenging to use their imagination. That makes sense to me. When we get caught in our grief, it is hard to manage many things we once took for granted. Imagination depends on a person’s ability to perceive something outside their established thoughts and engrained narratives. Trauma can induce fixed physiological and emotional responses that might block our natural ability to imagine new possibilities. This can be a temporary situation. We don’t need to stay here.
God created imagination. He gave us a tool to help repair and bring restoration as we discover new ways to address the difficult challenges life can bring when we look at it with God’s perspective. This is something everyone can use, no matter their age or circumstances. We just surrender our desire to control everything and ask God to reveal to us what we need. He has the perfect answer. Our imagination released under God’s loving plan will set the stage for us to engage in positive and healthy thoughts and feelings so we are equipped to discover very personal ways to overcome the stresses and obstacles keeping us from the life God wants us to live.
We are like common clay jars that carry this glorious treasure within, so this immeasurable power will be seen as God’s, not ours. Though we experience every kind of pressure, we’re not crushed. At times we don’t know what to do, but quitting is not an option. We are persecuted by others, but God has not forsaken us. We may be knocked down, but not out.
2 Corinthians 4: 7-9 TPT
Paul’s words to the Corinthians teach us we can be unbroken in Jesus. As widows, how many times do we feel like everything is broken? We feel the overwhelming pressures of life as we try to handle things without our beloved husband. We know we need God’s help like never before. With God’s love and grace, we can keep going. This passage teaches us how powerful the resilience of the human spirit is when anchored in Christ. God is reassuring us that even in our moments of vulnerability and weakness, we are held up by the strength of Christ.
We are made in the likeness of God. He tells us we are made in His image. His imagination created the beautiful world and the Garden of Eden. As we allow God to bring healing, we can harness the gift of imagination to help propel us into a future where we can enjoy a full life once again. It is my prayer widows reading this will see how critical imagination is to the quality of her life.
Perhaps a starting point can be to choose one situation in your life right now that is difficult, and you wish would change. Take a little time to imagine the outcome you want to see in this case. Be deliberate to see and imagine the change in the circumstances and consider how you expect you might feel when this turns around in a positive way.
It took me deliberately allowing myself to see myself holding my infant daughter. It was one of the hardest things I’ve done. My heart felt shredded and all the things I saw in the natural world around me seemed to scream “It’s impossible!” I was out of options for medical treatments. We spent nearly everything we had trying expensive infertility options. We were thwarted in our efforts to pursue adoption and being in a new state we weren’t established very long to meet a lot of requirements most adoption agencies wanted. The emotional and physical toll was tremendous. Thirteen years of going month after month after month stirring up hope “this time it would work” and then facing the letdown of finding it didn’t work again was devastating. All this added up to what looked like a mountain falling to crush all hope.
God is the God of the impossible. Nothing was too big for Him to handle. Adoptions in ten days with no real prep seemed insurmountable in the natural. The ways God opened the right doors, provided the right people, supplied the finances and everything else was truly a miracle.
As I remember this whole time, it’s fascinating to me how vivid the memories are. When I think of collapsing on my bed in utter devastation, I can still feel that tsunami of emotions and how crushed I was. I remember taking my daughter from her birth mother’s arms for the first time and knowing inside an overwhelming love for her and awestruck thanks to God. We hadn’t even really started a serious conversation with her birth mom, but I knew beyond a shadow of doubt this precious little baby girl was part of our family. The enemy threw a lot of obstacles at us to try to sow doubt and fear. God put an iron rod of confidence in my heart and nothing the enemy tried could deter our confidence. Having her placed permanently in our arms in just ten days has been a testimony that continues to give hope to others. God gets all the glory and honor.
Some of the challenges we face as widows can be addressed with the power of our imagination. There might be friends who disappeared from our life since we lost our husband. We can imagine sitting down with our friend and having a meaningful conversation that restores that relationship. Our tastes in food, clothes, or the décor we choose in our home may have changed. We can imagine trying new recipes or restaurants to discover a palate we can love in our new life. We can imagine a new wardrobe or envision a completely new color scheme and furniture in a room we spend the most time in.
It’s ok to take baby steps. Let your mind wander to explore new options. Depending on where you are in your journey, it might be hard to dare to dream again. I encourage you to begin to let your imagination be a launchpad to find new hope. It can fire creativity, relieve boredom, soften pain, enhance pleasure, and enrich the quality of your life moving forward.
For myself, God has been encouraging me to see myself as He sees me. It’s been a little hard for me to imagine. He has also been teaching me to declare the scriptures. There is healing in God’s Word. We will grow in our relationship and intimacy with God as we spend time reading and declaring His Word. When I was reading my Bible one day, I came across this wonderful passage where Paul is instructing the Colossians with practical ways to live together while demonstrating God’s love. It is a great example of how to imagine myself living in a way to serve God and love the people around me. Maybe you can imagine yourself in this as well. I adapted the passage to be in first person for myself.
Since I am divinely chosen to be holy, I am always and dearly loved by God! I robe myself with virtues of God. I am merciful as I endeavor to understand others, and I’m compassionate, showing kindness toward all. I’m gentle and humble, unoffendable in my patience with others. I tolerate the weaknesses of those in the family of faith, forgiving others in the same way I am graciously forgiven by Jesus Christ. If I find fault with someone, I release this same gift of forgiveness to them. Love is supreme and must flow through each of these virtues. Love becomes the mark of true maturity. My heart is always guided by the peace of the Anointed One, who called me to peace as part of His one body. I’m always thankful. The word of Christ lives in me richly, flooding me with all wisdom. I apply the Scriptures as I teach and instruct others with the Psalms, festive praises, and prophetic songs given to me spontaneously by the Spirit, I sing to God with all my heart! I let every activity of my life and every word coming from my lips be drenched with the beauty of my Lord Jesus, the Anointed One. I bring constant praise to God the Father because of what Christ did for me!
Colossians 3: 12- 17
Living beyond grief begins with imagining a life worth living. Moving forward with hope and strength is important for everyone. Knowledge gives us facts and information, and imagination helps us apply that knowledge in new and innovative ways. That’s the power of God working in us.
I will never doubt God’s mighty power to work in me and accomplish all this. He will achieve infinitely more than my greatest request, my most unbelievable dream, and exceed my wildest imagination! He will outdo them all, for His miraculous power constantly energizes me. I offer up to God all the glorious praise that rises from every church in every generation through Jesus Christ—and all that will yet be manifest through time and eternity. Amen! Ephesians 3: 20-21
About Teri Miner
Teri’s dance with grief actually began over five years before she watched her beloved husband of almost 37 years take his last breath and enter Heaven’s door on October 6, 2019. A terminal degenerative neurological disease steadily and increasingly attacked nearly every major system of his body and transformed him from a vibrant, brilliant, strong and caring man to a bedfast invalid at the end. She was devoted to caring for him and doing her best to make the most of every minute they had left, to love him and pray for a miracle.
She thought she knew what her future held, but she had no idea. Losing him was the first time she experienced a close and personal loss. He was the love of her life. The onslaught of the pandemic with its reign of fear-mongering, forced isolation and separation entering the scene and disrupting or destroying whatever sense of “normal” that remained, just added insult to injury.
Her faith in God is the sustaining force keeping her fighting spirit to find and share hope in a bright future. Her heart’s desire is to walk beside her fellow widows toward a path of promise and healing. She wants to offer encouragement and hope so others can find the strength to take that next breath or next step. She recently started her own blog, https://widowwhispers.blogspot.com/, to share with other widows not only the struggles and hardships of widowhood, but the triumphs. Her hope is found in leaning on the Lord Jesus to enjoy a God inspired future anchored in expectation He will bring us to a fulfilling and meaningful life.