Have you realized the magic of the sisterhood of widows?
I am so grateful for this opportunity to share in the sisterhood of widows at http://www.hopeforwidows.org. My first blog in this space fills me with pride and a mix of trepidation and self-doubt. But, I am not concerned nor embarrassed because I know I shall be accepted. This audience of readers understands and can appreciate me like no other.
You, my fellow widows, have become my safe place. We found one another when our past worlds became foreign and uncomfortable.
Upon becoming a widow, we were no longer viewed as the same person we once were. We became outliers amidst our friends and family.
Although still filled with love and support for us, they could not understand, nor relate, to the intricacies of our new journey. And, in reality, we didn’t know who we were becoming either. Our identity had changed. One foot was trying to remain inside our old comfortable world and the other was being forced into a new reality – that of a widow.
Don’t get me wrong. I love my old friends and have (finally) found a comfortable space to join them -when invited – after six years of loss. But, many of these relationships have changed and some have even ended.
I finally understand. They have not changed…
I have.
And, regardless of how hard it is for me to accept the truth, I have to, if I am to move on.
Thankfully, we have found one another – our sisterhood.
Together, we shall adapt, grow, cry, thrive and better ourselves so we can continue moving forward.
Let’s stop trying to be the person we once were. That person has been altered forever.
Instead, let’s celebrate the new YOU & the new US!
Sisterhood of widows – what a fabulous gift.
I welcome comments and the opportunity to dialogue with you. Our shared stories help provide inspiration and strength for all.
forever evolving
Susan
I also relate to the post as I am nearing my 2nd year without my husband- I know that I am not the same person- how could I be- the problem I find is that friends and family want you to get back to your old self- but they don’t realize you will never be that person again- Covid has made this shitty process even worse as it continues to isolate. This time of year is just the worst and I just try to keep moving- keep busy and reinvent the way I can celebrate and not feel so sad all the time.
I am sorry that others think they can tell you how to feel.
It’s your path and you do what feels right to you.
I hope i can be of help and wish your holidays are more enjoyable than you expected.
Hi Susan…..Thank you for putting the effort into creating this site! Your story is so similar to mine that it gives me comfort to know others feel the same as I do. I am sorry for all your losses and commend you for having the strength to create this blog to help others. I believe it’s in helping others that gives us a kind of healing and bond that we would otherwise not have had. I am also a widow of 6 years and have experienced multiple setbacks since the loss of my husband in 2014. I’m amazed at how resilient we are in the face of tragedy and look forward to the day we can all find some joy and meaning in our lives again.
Thank you for your comments & sharing your story.
And thank you for your kind words.
I truly believe we have so much more to give. Together we are stronger.
I look forward to hearing from you often.
What a wonderful idea! I met my husband when I was a young teenager, married him when I was 22, and lost him after 41 years of marriage, Oct 2019. Found many of the same things as you, friends came right after, but eventaully fell away. Then Covid. It’s a different world, but I have been carvign out a new life. Thank you for creating this group! So needed!
I’m glad to hear you are carving out a new life. Your story sounds similar to mine.
I hope you will continue to provide feedback and inspiration.
I look forward to it!
I married a month after turning 21 and my husband had just turned 22. We, too, were married 41 years. It’s been just over a year since he died. This isn’t a sisterhood I would have chosen but I’m so glad God has blessed me with friendships with other widows who share in my grief, who GET IT, who I can help,
also.
Our lives are certainly similar. You are lucky to have found a network of widows to share this new phase of life. I’m certain you are of great help to them.
Thank you for creating this space Susan. Your words are powerful, and ring true, yet bring comfort at the same time. I lost my wife at the end of March, so needless to say, the summer was long and lonely.
Keep up the good work.
David
As clear cliché as it sounds, I am truly so sorry for your loss.
Thank you for your kind comments David.
Thank you for this post. I’d always heard that widows lose friends after their loss, but now I’m experiencing it for myself. My husband passed away in mid-March, just as COVID hit. I know everyone is dealing with COVID and all that goes along with a pandemic, so it’s hard to know if the isolation I feel is from COVID or my loss. It’s been sad to have so many of my longtime friends go silent. I try to stay positive, but I still feel the loss.
I’m so sorry for your loss. It must be so difficult during covid.
I wonder if your friends know what you need during this time. Perhaps you can guide them by reaching out and gently suggesting a walk / talk?
Thankfully, you have found this community. It is so important.
Susan!
Thank you for acknowledging us as a whole and giving such light and love to what binds us together. Too often people want to point out the differences and you have spoke the truth about how we can relate. Thank you again!
I am so glad it resonated with you. Thank you for responding.