I have been struggling on how to tell my in laws that I have moved on. It is not something that is easy to just say. Today I saw them and didn’t say anything.
I wish I could just write them a letter but that is not something that would be okay.
Dear in laws,
Matt was my first love and the only person I ever thought I would be with. He was the perfect person for me in that stage of my life.
I never thought I would love again. My heart was so broken when he died. I was so lost. There were days that there seemed to be no hope.
Like some people believe I thought after a year my grief would just disappear. That did not happen. I attempted to move on to find someone to make me feel again.
That went horrible. I gave up again and decided that maybe I only get one love. In order to heal I need to figure out who I was again. I needed to live on my own.
Over a year and a half I did that. Finding the things that make me happy. Learning to love myself.
Then the thing I thought would never happen did. I met someone that reminded me what it felt like to be alive. He makes me happy and that is not something that I thought would happen.
I hope you will be able to understand that I love Matt. He will always own a part of my heart. I think that he would be happy that I have moved on.
I still want you all in my life. You are important to me and I consider you all family. I don’t want to lose you. And I hope I won’t.
I have been struggling with telling you that I am with someone for fear you won’t understand. In the end I am hoping I am wrong.