Often people are stumped at what to get for their friends during the annual holiday gift-giving season.
If the friend happens to be widowed, you might be scratching your head wondering what you could possibly do to bring a little comfort and joy to them.
In my case, things that had to do with my car were among the first few things I found myself needing. Wiper blades, a headlight bulb, and a new battery – were a few such things. So a gift card from an auto parts store is actually a pretty great idea for someone who may not be used to dealing with car maintenance and the expense that goes along with it.
My husband was a big strong guy and getting the 50-pound bag of dog food for our Cane Corso was nothing for him. Normally, I can handle such a thing as well, but brand new in grief, having barely eaten or barely slept, while it was icy and cold outside, this wasn’t the easiest task.
I managed but it would have been a huge help to have someone available to deliver the dog food to me.
Meal trains are a very helpful thing and I remain forever grateful for the one my community set up for my daughter and me. Foods that can be frozen and used later make an excellent addition to the traditional meal train. This is because the newness of the death will soon wear off for everyone else while the devastated family may still be deep in mourning for a while. Cooking can be hard when you are dealing with grief – but you still have to feed yourself and your family! Freezable meals are a godsend. (Also things like sourdough starters and non-perishable baking items are nice as well!)
Then there are other things that can bring comfort during rough times. Infused socks (with lotion and/or aloe) are nice. Essential oils that help inspire calm moods are helpful. A friend even sent a grief journal, and a family member sent a nice book called Tear Soup. (Others sent other books on grief and healing and as an avid reader, that was a wonderful gesture in my eyes!)
Of course, for those who are struggling financially, paying a bill or even just some cold hard cash is always welcomed.
These are just a few ideas for people who may be wondering what to gift to a widowed friend, new to grief or not. I am nearly seven years in and paying a bill for me, or a gift certificate for Chewy.com would absolutely still be well received by me and my dogs.
Money doesn’t even have to be involved. Go visit your widowed friend over the holidays. Or just offer to catch up on the phone. Drop a “thinking of you” email, or send a card.
Just letting your widowed loved one know that you still have their back, works wonders for keeping that alienated feeling that widows deal with far too often, at bay.
The holidays can be a lonely time, but even a little effort for someone grieving can make a big difference.
Images via BlinkiesCafe & BingAI
About Layla Beth Munk
Layla Beth Munk is a blogger & author who was thrust into this widowhood journey abruptly and tragically on February 11, 2018. Her husband of 12 years had ended his pain once and for all. She soon made the decision that she would not let his final decision define the rest of her life or their daughter’s life, so with her sense of humor at the helm, she started writing about her newfound station in life. Grief waves still get to her, and probably always will, but with the help of her fellow widows as well as friends and family, she has been able to realize her dream of becoming a published author! Layla is so grateful to Hope For Widows Foundation for providing this level of support to her, and so many others! Layla has two amazing children, one who is grown and one who is almost grown. She lives in eastern Oregon and has a wellness & beauty background. Layla enjoys writing poetry, watching anime, and homeschooling her daughter.
Her blog can be found at laylabethmunk.medium.com and her debut novella, 24 Hours in Vegas, is available on Amazon.