Remembering the first year after Todd died revives all of its raw, nearly physical pain. That year was a waking nightmare. Sometimes, another widow’s post or comment reminds me of the early weeks and months, and I hurt for her ...
I’m not sure if every widow does this, but I tend to gravitate towards watching any TV show or movie where the main character is a widow. It’s always interesting to me to see how the plot treats widowhood. Is ...
I don’t remember October. I think I wished it away because it is the month in which my love died and because it felt like the unofficial start of the holiday season, which I had been dreading. I didn’t even ...
Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things. Philippians 4:8 Sometimes it would be really easy to ...
As I was dealing with all the "fall out" of my husband's death, I found myself at the bottom of the list. The list of things to take care of always came before I cared for myself. I did not ...
Everyone experiences the loss of a loved one, and the losses compound as we age. In my 63-year span on earth, I’ve lost my father and mother, and all my grandparents, aunts, and uncles. The entire older generation is gone ...
4 months after Todd died, I was talking to a friend who develops websites about starting a blog about my experiences. She was supportive but asked me to consider if I wanted to be defined in the public eye as ...
When we are children we have dreams and visions of what our life will be like. It often is never what we envisioned. For me I didn't envision such pain and hurt. I didn't envision losing my husband to mental ...
You should be here! The four words I often find myself saying in my head. Simple four little words that go around in my head and can tend to bring emotions and other thoughts to follow. But he isn’t here, ...
I am more than just a widow. If I had a dollar for the number of times I was referred to as a widow, or "you know, the one whose husband died," I think I could buy myself a beach ...