I had an opportunity recently to learn a valuable lesson I hope to remind myself again and again throughout the year.
Setting the scene
This past week I was locked out of my car in the late afternoon on a cold and snowy day in the downtown core. It was beginning to get dark and the streets were very quiet on this holiday weekend.
Nervous concern began rising inside me.
I was forced to reach out for help. So I began to go thru my mental rolodex.
Who do I call? Will anyone realize I’m not home? Who should I burden? Why am I feeling so anxious and alone?
Reality is a bi#!h
After my husband died I came to the difficult realization that I am solely responsible for me now.
In the past, I would not have hesitated to call my husband for comfort and help. He was an extension of me. We were a team. He always had my back and we were responsible for one another. It’s what we did.
Who do I call?
I was filled with negative self talk. My inner voices were on overdrive!
- I don’t want to be anyone’s responsibility
- I don’t want to be anyone’s burden
Armed with my coaching tools, I brushed away the negativity and called my daughter. Her immediate offer to help warmed my heart.
I now wonder why I hesitated to reach out for help.
- Is it pride?
- Self doubt?
- A feeling of being needy?
- Fear of being rejected?
- Acknowledging how alone I truly feel?
Regardless. I am proud of myself for pushing out of my comfort zone.
The good news
I am so grateful for my daughter’s response when I texted her later that evening to say thank you.
“Always there and doing our best, you’re not alone you’ve got a whole big family.”
I was reminded that I am loved. Sometimes we need to be reminded.
Wishing everyone a happy and healthy year ahead filled with self-love and compassion. Remember, you were loved by your partner because you ARE worth it.