Grief and Seasonal Affective Disorder

We have officially turned the seasonal wheel from the light part of the year toward the darker days.

Autumn is many people’s preferred season and I absolutely understand why. It’s gorgeous and cozy and offers us many treats of the apple and pumpkin spice varieties.

But it’s also the time of year where the days grow shorter, the weather grows cooler and many people suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder, also known as SAD.

I am one of those people.

My own SAD is made much more difficult due to the fact that this time of year is heavy with the memories of my late husband, Bret.

What would’ve been our 16th wedding anniversary comes around in October.

He would be turning 52 in November.

The Holidays then follow, and those days have never been easy for me. I’m working on it, though.

My birthday comes in January.

Last but not certainly least, is his “angelversary” on February 11. (Five exact months from today, with five years gone, now.)

His celebration of life was ten days later, and that pretty much marks the end of the series of dates that remind me of the fact that I’ll carry this grief with me forever.

Spring is usually just right around the corner, and I start to feel like Greek Goddess Demeter, knowing that happier days are ahead.

The days get longer and flowers bloom.

My SAD starts to subside, allowing my clinical depression to feel a little lighter, like the blossoms on the trees.

I hate the fact that SAD cuts into my appreciation of Fall. As a writer and lover of Halloween, Fall offers me the chance to work on short stories and poetry that falls into the more spooky category.

I get treatment for my SAD and my depression in general, and it does help. But no matter how prepared I am, I know that I will most likely have more down days than during other parts of the year.

I highly recommend therapy if SAD is a part of your reality as well. There’s nothing wrong with seeking help.

As an aside, September is Suicide Awareness Month. 9-8-8 is the new Suicide Helpline. 

Your story isn’t over yet.

Fall sunset in Eastern Oregon  – photo by LBM

About Layla Beth Munk

Layla Beth Munk is a blogger & author who was thrust into this widowhood journey abruptly and tragically on February 11, 2018. Her husband of 12 years had ended his pain once and for all. She soon made the decision that she would not let his final decision define the rest of her life or their daughter’s life, so with her sense of humor at the helm, she started writing about her newfound station in life. Grief waves still get to her, and probably always will, but with the help of her fellow widows as well as friends and family, she has been able to realize her dream of becoming a published author! Layla is so grateful to Hope For Widows Foundation for providing this level of support to her, and so many others! Layla has two amazing children, one who is grown and one who is almost grown. She lives in eastern Oregon and has a wellness & beauty background. Layla enjoys writing poetry, watching anime, and homeschooling her daughter.

Her blog can be found at laylabethmunk.medium.com and her debut novella, 24 Hours in Vegas, is available on Amazon.