I have always been the person who can manage to find the humor in most situations.
Laughter has always been my drug of choice.
But when the realization that my husband was truly gone hit me, I didn’t think I would ever feel joy again.
I was wrong.
Yes, it took a little while but soon I could feel my smile coming back.
And Bret’s Celebration of Life was actually just that – a celebration. And as is normal with celebrations, there were plenty of laughs.
But grief is a tricky little thing, showing up in the midst of great happiness and then scampering off for a while before appearing yet again.
The high and low, back and forth action of the grief journey can be enough to make you feel absolutely off your rocker!
But as soon as we accept that this is just how grief is, we will be able to make strides in our healing.
When I meet people fresh in their grief, the light all but drained from their eyes, I want to tell them that yes, they will sparkle again.
Yes, you will smile and laugh again. You will, I promise.
But you don’t have to get frustrated if it doesn’t happen as quickly as you think it should.
Nor should you be upset at yourself if you find that humor is helping you to heal. (Some people get angry when they see a bereaved person actually enjoying things or having a good time! Which is sad, but unfortunately very prevalent.)
If there’s a chance for happiness – a chance for joy and laughter – we should accept it with abandon. I promise it’s okay to do so. It in no way diminishes the love you have for the person you are grieving.
Because it is true what the old adage says: laughter is the best medicine.
Sometimes we may need a little extra help finding joy again, and there’s nothing wrong with seeking medical help in times of illness, mental or otherwise.
But no matter the pathway, we will find joy again; joy will find us again.
Like everything else in our healing process, it just takes a little time.
Just be patient with yourself.
Our loved ones would want that for us.
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About Layla Beth Munk
Layla Beth Munk is a blogger & author who was thrust into this widowhood journey abruptly and tragically on February 11, 2018. Her husband of 12 years had ended his pain once and for all. She soon made the decision that she would not let his final decision define the rest of her life or their daughter’s life, so with her sense of humor at the helm, she started writing about her newfound station in life. Grief waves still get to her, and probably always will, but with the help of her fellow widows as well as friends and family, she has been able to realize her dream of becoming a published author! Layla is so grateful to Hope For Widows Foundation for providing this level of support to her, and so many others! Layla has two amazing children, one who is grown and one who is almost grown. She lives in eastern Oregon and has a wellness & beauty background. Layla enjoys writing poetry, watching anime, and homeschooling her daughter.
Her blog can be found at laylabethmunk.medium.com and her debut novella, 24 Hours in Vegas, is available on Amazon.