Guilt. It is that awful feeling that creeps up in dark moments – shows up unannounced, and with no true purpose, other than to torture with a million different “what ifs”. It has a sneaky way of allowing self-doubt to ...
Before and after. Two words that signify a complete and utter evolution in my life. From simple to complex...mostly predictable to unknown...happy to *it depends on the day and the hour*... Before and freaking after. A beginning that led to ...
Dreams - where do they go? The other day I overheard a couple of coworkers talking about their lives and careers. Listening to them I realized that I didn’t have any dreams for the future right now. Those dreams ...
I like my house now. I like living here alone. I like the comfort of my own home. I like the feeling I get when I pull in my garage and appreciate that I have a safe, warm, attractive place ...
As widows, we have so many things we might long for, but there are times when I literally BEG God to show me Shane. A breeze with his soapy smell wrapped inside of it, the subtle song of a wind ...
One of the most painful questions widows tend to ask ourselves days, weeks, months, and even years after our spouse dies is, “what would we be doing right now if you were still here?” Even though I'm in the thick ...
Well, not really, but I believe my meaning is clear. It’s a lonely dark word that we – as a culture – don’t like or know what to do with. It’s like the proverbial bad penny. Nevertheless, I suddenly found this ...
We used to have a favorite Chinese restaurant, my husband and I. It was this little hole-in-the-wall type place across the street from our apartment. I don't remember how my husband came across that place, but once he brought it ...
Tomorrow would have been my 23rd wedding anniversary. I think it still is, though, even though my husband is no longer here with me and I’m no longer married…have no husband…am no one’s wife. The anniversary date doesn’t change. 23 years ...