I had to laugh today while I was driving my daughter to work.

“What?” she looked over at me, smiling at my random little chuckle.

“If your dad were riding around with us right now, he would not know what to think.”

To that, she laughed too, because it was true.

We were bumping some heavy Czech rap that we became familiar with some time back. My daughter loved it so much that this particular performer was her number 1 listened to artist on her Spotify Wrapped last year.

Since she always takes control of the music, by way of my phone, the artist will probably rank pretty high on my Spotify Wrapped this coming year.

When Bret left this life, our daughter was more of a Lady Gaga-Katie Perry-Marina kind of music fan. Don’t get me wrong, she is still a devout listener of Gaga and Marina, but her horizons have been sufficiently broadened.

So have mine.

Things are so different.

He wouldn’t know our newest dog – who honestly probably wouldn’t even like him – he’s skittish around people he doesn’t know, particularly men.

Our daughter, who is nearing 19 now, works in tech and brings in a cushier paycheck than I do. Oh, and as for me, I took an online bartender class and got a job as a server/bartender at a hotel restaurant. Who knew I’d actually enjoy waiting tables? That would likely shock the hell out of him.

I have to chuckle (again), though, because at one point in Bret’s life, he worked for EcoLab. When I first got together with him, his home was decked out with all EcoLab products, and he spent plenty of time educating me about hotel, restaurant, and hospital cleanliness. Our hotel uses EcoLab products too, and seeing them made me feel like Bret is watching and approves of this career change of mine.

Our meek little daughter is one of the loudest voices in the crowd at the hockey games we attend, for which we are now Season Ticket holders. (“Season tickets?! For SPORTS?” I can hear him ask in disbelief.)

Driving around, listening to Czech rap, getting ready to drop our daughter off at her lucrative tech job, while I get ready to head home and clean because it’s my Saturday, would just be the tip of the iceberg for surprises for him now.

Instead of sad, though, I can’t help but feel pride in how far out of the ashes we’ve risen.

And I think he sees all of this, and probably likes it when our daughter turns the music up loud as she psychs herself up for a job that he would be extremely impressed with.

We are not the same as when you knew us, Bret. But life is all about change, and we are still very much alive.

(All photos copyright © Layla Beth Munk)

Mark your calendars! The Hope For Widows Foundation’s annual virtual Widows of Hope 5K is back! Join us virtually from Friday, May 8, through Sunday, May 10, 2026. This event is open to all—whether you’re a widow, widower, a friend or family member showing support, or participating in honor of a loved one or cause. Your involvement makes a real difference, with all proceeds directly benefiting widows through our Restoring Hope and Peace Grants, Sunshine Boxes program, and Bring Hope Holiday Assistance Program.  To register, support and find FAQs here: https://linktr.ee/hopeforwidows  + Sponsorship opportunities are available! If you or a business you know would like to support, we’d love to connect. Go here: https://hopeforwidows.org/5k-sponsorship/

 

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Layla Beth Munk

Layla Beth Munk is a blogger & author who was thrust into this widowhood journey abruptly and tragically on February 11, 2018. Her husband of 12 years had ended his pain once and for all. She soon made the decision that she would not let his final decision define the rest of her life or their daughter’s life, so with her sense of humor at the helm, she started writing about her newfound station in life. Grief waves still get to her, and probably always will, but with the help of her fellow widows as well as friends and family, she has been able to realize her dream of becoming a published author! Layla is so grateful to Hope For Widows Foundation for providing this level of support to her, and so many others! Layla has two amazing children, one who is grown and one who is almost grown. She lives in eastern Oregon and has a wellness & beauty background. Layla enjoys writing poetry, watching anime, and homeschooling her daughter. Her blog can be found at laylabethmunk.medium.com and her debut novella, 24 Hours in Vegas, is available on Amazon.

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