Since Todd’s death, people have told me, "he'll always be with you.” They mean well. They smile, maybe pat my arm and wait for me to nod in agreement. I know these words are a cliche, something to say to someone ...
The first holiday season without my husband was a bit of a train wreck. It all began with Halloween - my first major holiday as a widow. I remember walking into a craft store and being horrified by the display ...
Hey guys, your father died a little while ago, I said tearfully into my phone. Never thought I'd ever had to hear myself say those words so soon. Fathers are supposed to live to be grey-haired old men, yelling at ...
A young man asked if I was married. This is a typical question I get when I have conversations with strangers or people who don’t know my story. Often times it's women or older people. They see me without a ...
Anger is the greatest motivator because it’s limitless. When discussing the stages of grief, psychologist recite the five stages of the Kubler-Ross Model: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression then Acceptance As most of us who are widowed now know this model ...
There is a deep loneliness that encompasses my soul lately. It is similar to a shadow that follows you on a partly sunny day. It's always there. I'm keenly aware of the sunshine. But the longing for my husband and ...
It seems so many other Hope for Widow bloggers have written recently about significant dates without their husbands Those brave posts have been validating for me. Still, as I approach the one year anniversary of Todd’s death, I can’t write ...
Forrest Gump's mother was certainly wise with her iconic life lesson "Life is like a box of chocolates you never know what you are going to get" I have found that the grief process has been exactly like a ...
“What is in a Year?” I’m not even sure I know how to answer that question. I tell people all the time that I lost a year of my life. I remember very little of this past year. I have ...
The weeks and months after my husband passed away the guilt of "could I have done more?" kept me awake at night. When I was at the office, I'd stare at the wall wondering, "why am I being punished?" There's ...