It's so weird when someone passes suddenly. One second they are here, the next, they just aren't. In the hours following my husband's suicide, I found evidence of him everywhere that my mind had a difficult time processing. His phone ...
This has been a very long weekend for me socially, but it was good. Like every other time I have an event coming up, I freak out before. Events that I always had him at as a buffer for when ...
When my late husband died, I hated being home. Home had too many memories. It’s where we lived our lives. It was where he died. So to escape the pain of home, I traveled. A lot. If I was traveling, ...
Does anyone else clean their bathroom at 11 pm because even though they are on day 14 of not sleeping much they are not tired? Because at night when you lay down the anxiety itch becomes real, and it makes ...
Five years ago today, I held Rick’s hand in a death grip. A literal death grip, for hour upon hour. By noon of that day, I realized he was going to die, and he did, at 8pm that night. The ...
Most widows undergo a dramatic change in their identity after the loss of their husband. Everything that was ordinary and comfortable in a life shared with the person they lived in covenant with is altered. Most of us wrapped our ...
Old Me, New Me I found past pictures of me on my phone. Strange that I have taken a selfie around the same time every year. Old me from 2020 before the world flipped upside down. 2021 old me that ...
Grief is a puzzle you and God complete together. The way each widow experiences the pain and brokenness that overtakes her life after her husband goes to heaven is as individual and unique as each person’s fingerprint. The grief that ...
I’m currently reading a book from Pastor Tony Evans called Divine Disruption. It is about how the loss of his wife a few years ago tore a hole in the fabric of his family and affected the four adult children ...