FINDING YOU Just a few months after loss I decided to move out of state back to our Home town. I remember packing my kitchen with my friend and Pastor, Cami. She was carefully wrapping all of my serving dishes. ...
I bought a house. I bought it six months after losing Todd, the love of my life. I know, I know. Widows aren’t supposed to make any big decisions in the first year of widowhood. “Widow’s fog” and all that. ...
My son started high school today. My little baby is now a high school freshman. I’m not exactly sure how that happened. I swear just yesterday I was rocking him to sleep. And how he’s playing on his high school ...
Today I celebrate my 38th birthday and I’m reminded that it has also been 20 years (gasp!) since the very first birthday I celebrated with the kind young man who would become my husband. Turning 18 marked the beginning of ...
The day I heard that my partners body had been found, my emotions for him paused and I remained stuck in a world of guilt for many years. Guilt because I was still living, and my life was still moving ...
I was so excited for the opportunity to blog, which was shortly met with anxiety and “buyer’s remorse”. What did I commit to? Who really wants to hear my story. I wanted to quit before I began. I also wanted ...
Last night I spent a good hour reading the letters I had written Nate in the first few weeks after he died. The truth is, those days are such a blur...When I look back at his visitation hours and funeral, ...
I have been a remarried widow for seven months. It feels like forever and yesterday all at the same time. Just like death. When Jared died, I swore I would never fall in love again and certainly never get remarried. ...
For ten months I have driven by Lou Berliner Sports Park on the way to the gym in a haze of sadness, anger, and anxious curiosity. Each time my car exits onto Greenlawn, my stomach starts turning and the gnawing ...
What has death taught me? It taught me to stop saying someday. None of us are promised tomorrow and we need to make each day “someday.” It taught me to live each day to the fullest. Because each day ...